Depressed married man talks about how it feels to be childless

Depressed married man talks about how it feels to be childless

A depressed husband who got married six years ago has come online to voice out his worries.

According to him, he and his wife have tried lots of things just to have babies but none has yielded result. He talked about how they have tried their best physically, medically and spiritually just to have children but get disappointed over and over again.

The depressed man, who goes by the nick 'bonjovi12' on Nairaland recounts how they've tried to move on as a couple but everything around them, including the society and close associates, reminds them of their childlessness. Read his emotional out-pour below:

6 Years Of Marriage No Children.i Am Getting Depressed And Sad

File photo of a depressed black man

"Got married in 2011. No children. Doctors have diagnosed medical issues with me.Wifey has got some issues too but we have had them sorted. There are spiritual issues on wifey father's side.We have been praying.We have sowed seeds.We both love kids.We don't envy anyone but bless them when they have their kids.

"Have seen almost all my friends,church members and family all have kids.Some of them got married after us but are on to their second, third issue. Just heard that the wife of one of my guys that acted up during his marriage is preggies. Almost couple i know has kids.

"Have done procedures except IVF until a couple of years back.Spent money. We decided to use money to do other things and just trust God to come through. I'm not a saint.I.try for God. Bless people and do service. Prayers have revealed we would have kids.We have both had dreams about having our kids.

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"Today I'm just down. Depressed. Wish I had enough dough so i can risk doing enough IVF to give us our children but worried about squandering my lil savings and not get desired results. I need help.Pastors have ripped us off.Most of them wanted or wants something in return.

"Just pray God can just do it and now too. Wifey was not handling it well before till she signed out.Now is she just trying to live her life. Its getting to me.I am a correct Guy that people admire and some envy cos I have got some other things going on for me.

"I want above every thing else to be a father.Can't stand the stigma. I need help.Is there anyone out there who can help? Real, genuine individual prolly been in this before and knows and understands how it feels and overcame. I don't know.Just sad but cos I have a relationship with God no matter how ffed it is sometimes cos of my sins,I am still hopeful."

Well, lots of Nairalanders decided to advise the worried man, just to proffer probable solution. Jackeeh, one of the readers, advised him to wait on God and focus on the giver of children. '

Wait! Wait on God! Take your mind off children and focus your attention on the Giver of children. You've done your part so allow God do His, that is if you have any faith in HIM.'

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Another reader, Kingsouthie, wrote: 'Depression wouldn't help u n wifey at the moment, every prob has a solution, ivf is quite expensive but still has a high success rate, just keep faith and give it a try, in time yours would come...nb please forget about pastors here n there, your faith is all u need.'

And another reader wrote: 'Why not prep yourself up, take a deep breathe in and out, and then face IVF squarely? Of course you need to see a fertility specialist to decide if iVF is suitable for you. I understand the costs of IVF has come down, as there are more centers coming up. There are threads on NL which deal squarely with IVF experiences of people on NL. You'll be able to get various recommendations of good cheap centers. Make that a goal, and follow it through. All the best.'

What would you advise this worried depressed husband to do?


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